Scientific theory says it takes 28 days to break a bad habit. Perhaps, it takes 40 days to break a bad habit and then replace it with God. The significant time devoted to just being with the Lord changes people. It changed Moses and it has changed me. I am not the same person I was 40 days ago. Aside from losing 20 pounds officially (I didn't weight myself the first week so I am guess I lost another five pounds in the beginning) and lots of inches, I feel really good inside and out! I think I could probably fit into a smaller clothing size but I don't plan on shopping until next summer - back to school clothes will be my motivation and my time for celebration. I have also lost my appetite for my food addiction. The way I think about and look at food has changed tremendously, in a way that I never knew could happen. I just don't plain think about food as much as I used to. Not a meal would go by that I wasn't thinking about the next thing I could stuff in my mouth. I really don't find myself stuck in that mindset any longer. I still think about Reese peanut butter cups and pizza every once in a great while, but I know that someday I can have my own healthier versions of those things from time to time. I also find myself eating smaller portions and sometimes actually leaving food left on my plate after a meal. I feel freedom knowing I get to choose to take back control in my relationship with food. I still have emotional cravings at times and I have found myself eating just to eat once in awhile, but I am still choosing the better things to eat. God isn't done with me yet. We've got a lot more work to do but this time it isn't just another fad diet or extreme weight loss challenge. This time God changed me within and now we are working on the outside. I'm also thankful for the friends and family who are also choosing to change because I never feel alone in this journey. Just as I enjoy raising my baby girl alongside the people I love most, I am also privileged to become a healthier version of myself next to them as well. Now that I've updated you on my personal results, let's finish up this wonderful, difficult book of the Bible. Please open your Bible and read Deuteronomy 34 or just click here.
This chapter describes the death of Moses. So much in this short chapter pulls at my heart. God took Him up to the mountain once more. He showed Him the land He was giving to His people. The Lord actually buried Moses when he died. He had not lost his sight and was still strong when He died. Perhaps my favorite verses were the following:
"Since then, no prophet has risen in Israel like Moses, whom the Lord knew face to face, who did all those signs and wonders the Lord sent him to do in Egypt—to Pharaoh and to all his officials and to his whole land. For no one has ever shown the mighty power or performed the awesome deeds that Moses did in the sight of all Israel."(v.10-12)
What a man. He wasn't perfect but God used him in spite of all his weaknesses and mistakes. God raised him up and made him powerful in the sight of his people. He was just one man who God chose to do incredible things in and through. I cried when I read about Moses's death. It's so sad that he never got to cross over into the promised land but he did get to see it. What's more, if it hadn't been for Moses, perhaps none of the Israelites would have ever gotten to enter the promised land. Sometimes we may not always reap the full harvest but were very instrumental in the sowing. Let's not forget more importantly, he was rewarded with the presence of God. He knew Him face to face on earth and then was escorted into eternity to live face to face with Him in Heaven. He crossed over to a different promised land.
I believe I will enter my own promised land. I have faith that as I complete this 40th day of blogging, I will begin to cross over. It will be a long walk to finally get there, but I know that's where I am going. It is always possible that, like Moses, I may not reach it here on Earth. Perhaps, I will just be instrumental in securing it for others. If only my future descendants are changed because I chose to change my eating habits, I will be thankful. However, I don't believe that's it for me though. God told Moses he wasn't entering. I believe God told me that I am. I will persevere. I will continue to walk. I will continue to fight. I will NOW CHOOSE LIFE because I have trusted God to help me fight this battle.
Moses's death ushered the Israelites into their new lives in Canaan. He died and passed on the torch to young Joshua to lead. Sometimes it takes death to find life. Perhaps, sometimes we must choose death in order to choose life. I had to choose to die to self so that God could do a work in me. I had to let go to find freedom. I had to lay down the old ways in order to better learn new ways. Death has brought me to a deeper life in Christ. This time it includes living life more abundantly in body, mind, heart and spirit.
“Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it." (Mark 8:34-45)
Let us not not forget the most important story of death bringing forth life. As we enter Holy week take a moment to remember what Jesus accomplished on the cross for each of us. His death and resurrection brought new life to all who believe.
In John 12:23-24 is says, "Jesus replied, “The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds."
The way to find new life is through death. I believe that just as we find new life in Christ through His death and resurrection, we can also experience little glimpses of new life in Christ through dying to self. If we can learn to crucify our own flesh and earthly desires, we will become less and He will become more. The more we see Him, the more we can become like Him. The more we become like Him, the more we bring glory to Him through our lives. Not only will I be changed through my own "death" but perhaps I can change the world around me a little bit more each day. My prayer is that I can be a simple light in the world like Jesus, Moses and so many others who learned how to listen to God's voice and walk in His ways. I know I can never compare to their greatness but I don't want to either. I just want to be the best Leah Turner that I can be and fulfill the purpose God has planned for my life. Today I choose death that there might be life.
Thank you for joining me along for this ride. I have treasured every kind word, testimony and encouragement. As I said yesterday, we must now keep walking. We each have a destiny. Let's continue walking in His ways together. I will probably pop back in from time to time to share what God is doing in my new life. Please continue to share with me what God is doing in your life, as well. I am believing big things from God because He is a big God.
Father, thank you doesn't seem enough. There are no words to describe the gratitude I have for You and your ability to never give up on me. This has been one lifelong battle but finally, I am experiencing breakthrough. Finally, I am living in the freedom You have been offering to me for years. I need You even more now. This blog has been a way to work in and through me. I need You to continue to challenge and encourage me even when I am not writing a daily reflection from Your Word. I pray You will help each of us continue to step out into the great destiny You have planned for our lives. Forgive us for the moments we were not walking in step with you in the past and give us strength as we earn to choose to death that there might be life. We love You, Lord. Amen.
Now Choose Life.
No comments:
Post a Comment